Other blogs participating in LSU Hate Week

The dapper young squires at Speed Limit 18 have a photo essay (which is really more like a photo dissertation) which is more than likely able to light a hate-flame under the ass of any good Rebel fan who views it. Click here at your own risk.

SEC Power Poll - Week 12

If either Juco-All American or Ivory Tower had voted the Rebels at 5th instead of 6th, we would have submitted our collective ballot with Ole Miss as the outright 5th best team in the league as opposed to being tied for such with the Gamecocks.

Why does this matter? Because, after compiling all of the 20-something blog ballots, the Rebels and Gamecocks are, just as in our ballot, tied in the power poll for 5th. Read about it here and, as always, the graphic is below.

One final note: normally I would have you visit Garnet and Black Attack to see the best comments about each team as they are the blog which hosts this fine power poll. However, Joe Cribb's Car Wash's comments about LSU were too good to not post here (and everywhere on the intranetz). I drew a few stares into the cubicle laughing at this

I dunno, I'm starting to think opposing defenses are sending Jarrett Lee e-mails like DEAR MR. LEE: MY NAME IS PRINCE TEBO MUTOMBO OF THE REPUBLIC OF PIKSIXIA AND I HAVE INHERITED 47,000 FOOTBALL POINTS AFTER THE DEATH OF MY FATHER KING LORENZO MUTOMBO OF PIKSIXIA. I NEED YOU TO HELP ME KEEP MY FOOTBALL POINTS SAFE. IF YOU ARE WILLING TO PAY VIA INTERCEPTION TRANSFER A SMALL SCOREBOARD INCREASE FEE OF SEVEN FOOTBALL POINTS FOR ME, I WILL MOVE MY POINTS TO A SAFE ACCOUNT IN GAYNESVILLE AND BE ABLE TO GIVE YOU 7,000 FOOTBALL POINTS AS A TOKEN OF MY GRATITUDE. THEY WILL BE YOUR POINTS YOU CAN USE TO WIN YOUR TEAM FOOTBALL. PLEASE HELP ME MR. LEE

Well done, Auburn bloggers. Well done.

It's not just us, LSU

That's right, it's time for you to know, LSU. All the bloggeurs took a vote and decided that we here at the RSC be the ones to tell you. Um, gosh, I don't know how to say it.

Everyone really hates you.

Even your own fans know it.

We didn't know how else to tell you except through the various signs spotted across the college football universe(see: here, here and here).

Other fans hate LSU for various reasons: your coach, your tradition, your fans, etc.

But to sum it up, it's your arrogance that gets me the most. You don't know how to win with class or have class at all come to think of it. For example, LSU fans chant L-S-U at the Sugar Bowl when they aren't even playing in it. 

Granted, if Ole Miss won a national championship, I would be much more of an asshole to every other SEC team or fan I came into contact with, but for some reason, maybe because you were so irrelevant for so long, you just have to bask in your current glory spewing your "TIGAH BAIT" propaganda and flinging Evan Williams bottles at opposing fans.

So there it is, LSU. Our hate week has yet to come to a close, but just in case you thought Ole Miss fan's hatred was due to jealousy, don't you worry. Everyone hates you.

SEC Power Poll - Week 11 ballot

You better believe we're jumping into the top 4 when we beat LSU on Saturday.

Rank	Team	Change	Comments
1	Florida	+1	Hello, D1 football. I'd like you to meet your future BCS champs *cough* who couldn't beat Ole Miss... giggity *cough*
2	Florida	-1	The Tide's win over Mississippi State was a great metaphor for their season. Steady, often underwhelming production that, after it's all over, looks like a dominating performance.
3	Georgia	+1	Maybe Stafford should do more keg lifts.
4	LSU	-1	Scheduling a Sun Belt team sure is fun. I mean, you invite them to your place, score at will, shut them out, etc. Right LSU? C'mon, you know what we're talking about, right? LSU? Oh....
5 TIE	Ole Miss	+1	Don't blame me for the tie; I had the Rebels at 5th on my ballot. So did Whiskey Wednesday. Juco and Ivory Tower however, well, they suck.
5 TIE	South Carolina	---	Now Steve Spurrier knows what it feels like to be on the receiving end of a Florida offensive orgy.
7	Vanderbilt	---	Congrats on gaining bowl eligibility, Vanderbilt. No joke here.
8	Kentucky	---	While Rich Brooks obviously thinks it's bullshit, I'm curious as to how the rest of the Wildcat nation thinks about this season?
9	Arkansas	---	Arkansas could finish their season with victories over State (duh) and LSU (a bit of a stretch) which would give the Fayetteville faithful something to build upon for next season.
10	Auburn	---	It looks like Tony Franklin was only one part of the problems on the plains.
11	Mississippi State	+1	The Bulldogs were eliminated from bowl contention the same day their in-state rival earned eligibility with 59 flashy points.
12	Tennessee	-1	Last night Nick Stephens had a nightmare last night that the Volunteers are going to hire a head coach specializing in the spread offense.

i can haz anuther stoopid t-shurt

Get ready to berate your fellow fans, because you know this crap is just around the corner.

EP Update

Polynice went in for a knee scope today and apparently they found some more damage and is now going to be out for four months.  That sucks.  Have not seen this reported on Rivals or Spirit yet, but it has made its way on to NAFOOM.

Could be a very long season now.  Terrico White better get his ball on.

Not going to do a preview on the USA game, because I do not feel like looking stuff up about them.  I know they were good last season and they are still a good team.  Should be a tight game.  I'll do a recap later tonight.

LSU HATE WEEK - YouTube numero dos

If you'll recall, a while back I wrote a post with a slew of YouTubes which showed LSU fans in their typical insanely douchey douchedom. There were grown men doing Da SoUlJa BoI(!!1), a guy too drunk to stand, and a coonass sliding head first into a table. The shot, if you'll recall, was taken from about 40 feet away. Well, faithful Cup fans, bask in the glory of this extended version of that same incident from a mere 6 ot 7 feet away.


BOOM! Headshot

What a great sound... ker-CLACK!

And what an appropriate allegory to this upcoming Saturday! The Tigers are going to slide along along their bellies (as they maybe-not-really-kinda-sorta have been doing all season long) until up pops our Rebels like the end of a table! I also imagine that, if he even gets a chance to play, Jarrett Lee will end up writhing on the ground in pain like our video's star after his meeting with Jerry, Locket, and Powe LLP.

Oh, and you know he's super-duper-way-out-in-orbit fucked if Hardy doesn't forget his magic shoes.

Daily Reveille Exposes Red Stick Fans

This just in from LSU's The Daily Reveille:

LSU Fans are douches.

The entirety of the hard-hitting, investigative journalism is here, but this snippet gives you the general idea:

Last weekend was one of the most surreal experiences of my life, and I’m not talking about the football team’s heartbreaking loss to Alabama.

I’m talking about the hours I spent around campus tailgating — but not as a regular Tiger.

For this game, a fellow staffer and I, armed with a video camera and microphone, ditched our normal attire, threw on crimson-and-white sweatshirts and walked through campus to see what it would be like behind enemy lines.

And...

“Rip. Rip. Rip. Rap. Rap. Rap. You ‘Bama girls got the clap, clap, clap!”

And...

[T]he amount of times we were spit on also struck a nerve.

Without dwelling on the satisfaction derived from a journalistic acknowledgment of LSU's lewdness or the irony of Tiger fans deriding the (perceived) women of Tuscaloosa for their sexually transmitted diseases (Pot, kettle, and all), I should just note that both the character of Tiger fans and their lack of literary skill ensure the remoteness of the possibility that the final plea of The Reveille's article...

[M]aybe we need to tone it down — just a bit.

...will in any way be heeded.

Women of the Opposition: LSU

LSU fans are known for their barrage on our senses. Their smell, which as everyone knows is corn dogs/casino buffet/cigarettes all mixed together, their sound of Cajun speak and the sight of their women. 

LSU has the extreme disadvantage of being the only university that's worth a damn in the entire state, which means PLENTY OF UNFORTUNATE LOOKING FANS.

And look at this hotty.

Oh shit, that's a guy.

For the most part, it seems the LSU female faithful enjoy wearing jerseys with denim skirts(see: here). How thoughtful you are to take the time to climb off of last night's mistake, grab a wrinkled jersey, grease up the hips and squeeze into your skirts. Quite the classy bunch.

I do have to give some credit to the LSU Golden Girls. If nothing else they're skinny, so they've got that going for them. 

And they don't look like this. 

Then, there's a photo that might be one of the more unsavory women I have ever encountered on the internets.

Your look of disdain says it all woman in blue with white capri pantaloons

I'm Not Happy About This Either

The Southeastern Conference has rivalry games that span from the mundane Third Saturday in October and the now-non-existent Cocktail Party to the Tetanused Iron Bowl and the ridiculous Egg Bowl. We trade Golden Boots and Governor's Cup, and, despite Auburn and Georgia's claim, have a boatload of Old Deep South Football Rivalries.

Have we now stooped so low?

Perhaps this is no Platypus Trophy, Illibuck, or Telephone Trophy, but there's something about flowers that betrays a sense of fierce competition.

"Southern Showdown," "Southern Shoot-Out," "Duel Under The Oaks," "Magnolia Classic" or "Magnolia Bowl" were the options presented to the various student bodies for the name of this 97-time meeting. All of the options were fairly non-descript. And, so, I submit to you the name I wrote in when the student body was given the option of voting:

The Battle for Billy Cannon's Heisman

Followers of The Cup need not be taken back to Halloween Night 1959 when the Rebels' perfect season was ended on an 89-yard punt return by that year's Heisman Trophy winner - Running Back Billy Cannon, as the Tigers won 7-3. I was not alive in 1959, much less was I a Heisman balloter, so I cannot make a good judgment about whether or not Cannon's game-winning run sealed his trophy-win. And I need not remind the true faithful in the Order of Vaught that Ole Miss returned the favor on New Year's Day of 1960, blanking LSU 21-0 in the Sugar Bowl.

These two games are the most important in the 114-year history of this rivalry. Halloween was the crowning moment of Billy Cannon's Heisman campaign; New Year's Day knocked the shine of his recent honor.

Now, obviously, we cannot have Billy Cannon's actual Heisman (it's been on loan to T.J.'s Ribs in Baton Rouge since 1986, where Billy Cannon, obviously, eats free). Rather, the universities ought to seek the permission of the Downtown Athletic Club to create a replica. The replica will be placed on a large wooden base, and the results of each game since 1894 would be inscribed onto plates on the base. The interesting wrinkle - instead of the actual score of each game, every Ole Miss win would be indicated by 21-0; every LSU win would be indicated by 7-3, thus honoring the two most important scores in the history of the series.

I know it's over now; sour grapes and all that. Nevertheless, this recent development in tradition suffers from the same top-down imposed enthusiasm that doomed "The Rebel Express," that stupid motorcycle, and the campaign to replace Colonel Reb.

Of course, had there been blogs in 1927, some know-it-all bloggeur like myself might well have sat down to bemoan the stupid new trophy to share with the Cow College down the road that, ridiculously, looked like an egg. They might well have hurled insults at William Hemingway and wondered why out university felt the need to create a trophy game with a team against whom we had, to that point, mustered only five wins, ever.

Then again, the fine students who took it upon themselves to engage in a violent riot after the 1926 exchange between the Flood and the Maroons would never have christened their heated rivalry with LSU after a flower.